August felt like a month of reset. Even though it was busy with work and installations I felt like I was constantly taking a step back looking at the life that I’ve built and questioning it. I tend to do this every once and a while to make sure I’m happy with the track that I’m on. Something felt off, but the answer was foggy. I couldn’t read what it was. I couldn’t read my body. I felt so disconnected from myself. The result were tears and frustration. Thank god for my friends and their advice. The problem was I wasn’t moving forward. I’m a hard worker. I know that. I’m also extremely disciplined. This I know too. I understand persistence and never giving up. I’ve had to learn how to do both. But if you’re not careful hard work, persistence, discipline are not enough. You need to be proactive. That was my problem. I was playing it safe. I wasn’t stepping out as much as I should have. I found myself dreaming too often about the life I wanted rather than going out and making those dreams tangible. It was a huge wake up call for me. It was so easy for me to fall into the natural groove of my business. Comfortable really. The enemy will fool your mind to think external issues are the problem. But really the shift had to happen within me. I know this. I’ve always known this. Which is why it’s even scarier to think I forgot. So I poured myself a coffee (or two) and started to email every single interior design firm I have wanted to work with. The list is long. Some got back to me, most didn’t. But now I have new meetings with new people, and I get to walk into their space and introduce myself - step out of my comfort zone. I never really understood when they say you’re in charge of your own fate. I always believed if things are meant to happen they will happen as long as you work hard enough. That mentality can only get you so far. There will be a moment in your life when you need to push harder - or take larger steps to show God just how bad you want something. My perspective changed immediately.
Loads of new stuff coming in the next couple months for CKD. I’m coming in stronger.