// Thursday thoughts

I've never been a fan of not knowing what's going to happen next. But I guess I've been through enough by now to know that trying to stay on top of change is just a waste of my time, and sometimes things are left best in the hands of serendipity. This has sort of been my theme for the past couple months. I know now that things will work out the way they are supposed to, but let me tell ya - while standing in an earth quake ranking at like a 6.1 things are not fun. As the ground shakes the things around me have fallen leaving me with nothing to hold on to other than well, myself. I had so many reservations about leaving for New York and isolating myself from all my friends and family in a city that's nearly impossible to afford. But as 2015 comes to an end, I'm happy I've come here. I couldn't escape this uncomfortable feeling of being unsure, so I was forced to sit with it. And I mean like all.the.time - during dinner, over coffee, and sometimes even over cocktails [the nerve right]. Maybe this is what comes with being 27 -finally finding your voice/wanting more/not quite ready for what I want, but I've come to the conclusion that life is going to be uncomfortable for a little while longer, and I'm just sort of putting my hands up in surrender. Too many unanticipated life changes have happened in the last two weeks that couldn't have turned out as well as they did even if I tried to make them happen myself. If you're reading this and going through something similar, I feel ya homie. 2016 get here already. x-C